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Often we try to change people to meet our standards. This is the same as trying to get people to be more like us.

You want your spouse to do more of this and less of that. But have you thought of the consequences?

If your partner did everything you do then you would have nothing to
contribute. And a feeling of dissatisfaction is bound to arise from that.

So maybe when he/she keeps on doing that thing you always talk about but it doesn’t seem to change…maybe that thing comes naturally for you and is your gap to fill.

We don’t mind doing what comes naturally to us anyway. It’s just when we question why others aren’t doing the same that we stumble.

Here are a few things I have learned from exercising.

Enjoy the ride and don’t become fixated on your progress; it’s about enjoying every moment. The results will come and the best thing to do is to enjoy doing it. Overthinking every move will deplete your joy-meter and can lead to a lack of consistency which will influence results.

After too strictly adhering to some of the training “rules” you learn to loosen up while sticking to a few fundamentals, which are individually established. And this in turn reminded me of the subjective nature of life. Different programs showed me that people hold different beliefs and that it is okay, I let them be and trust that they know best for them while I do me.

Routines teaches discipline but you also learn to transcend what others say and follow your gut. As I continue my journey I find myself leaving the mental space where everything is analysed and I start feeling my workout more. Your program might say run for X-amount of time today, but you can definitely feel that you can do more, or maybe less. Follow the program or your intuition/gut?

Another example would be eating habits. There are so much information and contradicting opinions regarding this subject. I’ve learned to take what works for me and leave the rest. The essence of life is not in nutrition – we are sustained by Divine Love. No need to get hung up over the form your food comes in. Relax and savor the taste.

Many of these “lessons” can be applied to everyday life, but probably one of the most obvious in today’s society is “trying too hard”. By exercising I realised that there is a point at which I am trying too hard. I’ve made my best gains while I wasn’t worried about what I am eating or how I am training. Not being “worried” doesn’t mean that I didn’t have my preferences as to what to eat and how I want to do things. But I didn’t allow myself to get in my own way.

Instead I acted with ease and without feeling that my whole routine is going to crash if I couldn’t do the amount of reps, or eat the specific nutrients, or sleep the exact amount of hours.

All in all, exercise made me shift my focus away from my body and to the happiness the journey brings.

Here is the scenario:
You receive a message from your neighborhood security stating that your area is being targeted by a gang who steals plants.
A meeting is organised and all the neighborhood is invited. Enough people attend and a conclusion is reached: the plant-thieves must go!

The question is how is the best way to go about this.
Group A would by default make it their primary concern to warn everybody about the plant thieves as well as spread the message across borders where it is not even relevant. The EMOTION of fear is what they spread because the focus of their message is on the danger of the situation. Group A may also pray for the families who lost many plants with a FEELING of loss and trepidation, pleading to God to restore peace with a mind filled with anxiety.

Group B will note the plant thievery and the feeling of fear the message naturally embodies due to its unwanted nature. Yet by default they will focus on the vision of restoration by focusing on the opposite FEELING of fear, called love. They will also pray for those families who lost many plants by thanking God for the joy of gardening and with a peaceful mind. They will not be warning anyone or bring up the topic of plant thievery at family occasions or in their daily business, because it activates a FEELING of fear. Instead they talk about topics that FEEL good.

Like-attracts-like: this means focus on fear and you perpetuate it, focus on love and you perpetuate it. Focus on the problem of plant thievery and it will continue and even escalate. Focus on the vision of a peaceful neighborhood where plants are not stolen and it will come to be.

This has been demonstrated in real life where a neighborhood set a up a public shrine where people could stop to pray when they felt like it. The result was a measurable decrease in violence in the area. Yet soon after the shrine was taken down and the people stopped activating the FEELING of peace through prayer the crime rates went up again.

Become aware of your emotions and how the topics you think about make you feel. Then choose to think and talk about the good feeling topics and the unwanted will naturally disappear, first in your mind and then in your life and the lives of others who follow the example.

The misunderstanding is that we can solve the problem by thinking and talking more about the problem.

This example of plant thievery should be applied universally by omitting the words “plant thievery” and inserting current, distressing events you witness on the daily news.

*questions and discussion are welcomed in the comments

The only time we do not accept people’s choices is when we believe that we know better. But how could we claim to know the inner depth and experiences of another, what they think and feel. Each person knows best what is best for them at any given moment, although it might not seem so from the sideline.

The contrast of life, the seeming “good” and “bad”, is something we all define for ourselves. Divine Love is unconditional, so no decision is criticised as “right” or “wrong”. Maybe you’re observing someone making “bad” decisions in life. Have you considered that the seeming “bad” decision might be the contrast they want to experience to gain a new level of understanding?

Spirituality teaches to stick with the pole of Love, because it is the One true reality. Yet the foundation of this physical world is based on the “illusion” of the opposing pole called Fear, and every derivative emotion in between. We use “illusion” because Fear (sickness, disease and death) doesn’t hold the qualities of Divine Love (Love, Truth and Life) yet it can be experienced as far as we make it real through our beliefs (the thoughts we continue think).

So by going through life we notice things we like as well as what we dislike and from that we carve our desires; we define what makes us happy. This gives us a sense of purpose, of moving towards something. The lesson is not to emphasise the things we do not like, the things that doesn’t feel good when we think about and observe them, but instead use them to more clearly focus on and define what makes us happy.

This way life will not bring us down, seeming to rob us of our happy mood, but it will serve our highest good by providing in every moment the opportunity to redefine our personal happiness, which is also the happiness of all.

Accept the intrinsic perfection of Life, and that the law of “like attracts like” serves all according to their desires.

*Questions or discussion is welcomed in the comments

There is nothing you cannot be, do or have. There is nothing you have to do, and in doing so you can never get the doing done. Because once you finish with one thing you will have desired the next and continue with that. So life is not about how many things we do, but how we feel focusing on them while doing. Feeling good is the reason for doing and the inspiration from which it emerges – inspired action. No one thing is better than another, and what is best for you is subjective to your own current truth. What we choose to do then is not based on anything other than that it feels good to do. It matters not what society, family or friends think of what we choose to do, they do not know us deep inside, but we do. Many have said, “follow your heart”. This is how to do it. Desire and act without criticizing yourself or others for what they are busy with in their lives. This frees both yourself and them. You cannot claim to understand another deeply enough to know why they desire certain experiences, be it deemed “good” or “bad” from your perspective. The only perspective that contributes to the greater good is that of forgiveness, and forgiveness is simply looking past criticism in anything, anyone, situation or ourselves. This is unconditional love. This does not mean that we do not have preferences or that we do not notice things that we do not like, but it is in how we use these things that makes the difference. Noticing anything unwanted can only be used to immediately direct our attention to what we want instead, thereby maintaining our own good feeling and potentially uplifting another by emphasizing only things to appreciate and not its opposite.

The nature of reality is only Goodness. There is no source of suffering. All suffering is by our own choosing, when we resist the Goodness of life by choosing an illusion instead. Having free will we are free to experience this illusion of suffering as real, be it pain, loneliness, grief, anger, hatred, anxiety – it is all the same. Thus we only suffer by our own thoughts and nothing else.

So it is true that life is perfect and salvation (which is another word for “happiness) complete, waiting only to be acknowledged by giving it attention through appreciation and self-love. Everyone gets what they ask for in thought and feeling. The goal of life is not to measure our performance and grade us. The only real meaning of life is happiness. Life reflects us, in people, objects and in all things. What we see in life we see in our own minds. Not one thing carries any meaning apart from what we give it, and by doing so we receive what we give. Give then the highest thoughts to all that cross your mind or move past your eyes to see. Heed only to the witnesses of love and let go the thought-messengers of separation called on by criticizing. The goal of life is pure desire without opposing thoughts.

We cannot desire two opposite things on a specific subject simultaneously, the one with the most weight will be the one we chose and manifest for us to experience physically.

Everything happens for a reason and the reason is that we chose it, consciously or not. To gain control over what we experience we must only become aware of our own thoughts and how they make us feel. Build on the good feeling thoughts and let go of the rest. This is our guidance system we can trust, it sees beyond what the mind can currently conceptualize.

In moments we feel unsure of of a specific decision we must first get out of our minds. Switch on the music and laugh. Laugh so much that you cannot think and leave the decision-making for a moment. Once you have released it and arrived at the place of feeling good you will stand in amazement at how obvious the answer to your question is.

Practice feeling good more than you practice its opposite.

Visualisation is a game we play to enhance the way we feel about specific topics, and by our good feeling emotions we allow the flow of Life into our lives. The better we feel, the more we are allowing our highest desires to come into our experience.  When we observe a not-so-good feeling thought we immediately, and consciously shift our attention to what feels better regarding the current topic, or we just focus on anything else entirely that feels better.

We can practice feeling better by doing the many things we love. Visualisation is another way of becoming acquainted with feeling good, so when the not-so-good thought appears we can easily identify it. It’s all about your base experience, the feeling you are most accustomed to. Live a life of pure joy and even the slightest thought in the wrong direction will immediately alert you attention. Being well versed in choosing better feeling thoughts we have the ability to comfortably switch our perspective and maintain our emotional alignment with God/Life.

I always thought that visualising means creating very clear pictures in my minds-eye, but through experience I’ve come to understand it differently: one way in which I visualise is with music and dancing. I turn on the music and start dancing with the pure intention of feeling good just for the sake of feeling good (because it feels so good feeling good!). No use in visualising when you are feeling down.

Once I feel good  I spontaneously shift my attention to a topic of my choice and briefly describe the scene, the people or lack of people, the atmosphere, but most importantly the feeling of it. I might see myself in front of the mirror in my room with my ideal body, I lift my hand in a gesture of success and feel the absolute inspiration and adoration towards this image of myself. Then I quickly open my eyes and continue dancing and focusing on my immediate environment as not to get over analytical about my visual.

What we focus on we pray for. It is important to pray without a feeling of lack of the thing we are focusing on or criticism of why we cannot have what we want. Our prayer/desire must be untainted by opposing thoughts as we embrace the thought and feeling of that which we ask for in confidence that Life always provides, because it is law. Life provides whatever we focus on whether we want it or not, because focusing/thinking is asking.

Some other visualisation games includes surfing the internet for pictures of things I want while feeling like I have them, or watching videos of things I want or like.

I also love walking and thinking thoughts of appreciation towards everything in my environment. Once again, the state of appreciation is a state of receiving blessings without any resistance. We live, move and have our being in he richness of Life, Life which is only and supremely Good. There is no source of “evil”. And when we feel good we align with who truly are and Life flows naturally. When we feel down we disown ourselves for a lesser image and the goodness of Life cannot reach us, not because it is not always loving us without terms, but because Life gives us free will and will not force upon us that which we do not ask for.

Self-love and appreciation is the door to a fuller life experience.

From the external perspective the happiness of life appears to be short lived: we eat a chocolate and then it’s done, we visit a friend and then it’s over.

But consider the idea that life is meaningless – no person, situation or thing has any intrinsic meaning other than what we give them.

If we look at happiness from this perspective we can begin to experience it differently. If the chocolate and the encounter with friends gave me happiness because I gave it that meaning, then I can choose that meaning everywhere regardless of the external event. It is my decision.

Now happiness doesn’t disappear when our friends go home or the weekend is over, because we know that we are the source of happiness that we seek. This happiness is consistent and changeless in nature – but how steadily we experience it is up to us.

We can attach any meaning to life that we wish, but know that the only Real meaning is Joy.

Timelessness in time, the Eternal Now, the Present.

This is the point from which we connect with God and break old patterns  – when the critical mind is still. Here the past doesn’t matter, it is not required to move forward. Bring nothing of the past to the Eternal Now and enter into Timelessness within time. Here we trust our future into God’s care, so there is no anxiety. We recognize that all we need is right here, Now, as we unite with God and all creation.

The question and the answer arise simultaneously, time does not separate them. Neither is there any order of difficulty from God’s all-knowing Mind. To know where to go next, what to say and to whom we need first to come to the Present and leave our critical mind behind.

Like a new born baby, without past or conception of future and with a  joyful heart trusting in God to answer our call as we come to find direction for our next step. Choose to follow the past and we repeat old patterns. Come into Now with joy and a still mind.

As we come into Now we may witness many ideas we hold crossing our minds – worries, plans, grief, anger, anxiety… Let it go. Come into Now. Observe them like a baby who knows not what they mean. Forget who you are, your ideas about yourself and the world at large, where you are going or where you come from. Just be here, joyfully and content and you will know your Self, the Self that is connected and Real.

From this clean slate you will see new desires arise. These desires feel good and pull on you with joyful strength and some measure excitement. This is the call to act. Now follow these joy filled ideas, accept God and start with what feels best for now.

Now we are moving with the flow of Life. And our experience will reveal its perfection as events synchronize into harmony and we move joyfully throughout the day. What could the critical mind in its limited perception know that God cannot reveal to us directly through our intuition. Isn’t the critical mind the serpent in the garden of paradise, the knowledge of good and evil, the constant judging against ourselves as we choose to do what we think is right instead of what we know and feel is best for us.

We hesitate to let go of our own understanding/perspective because we do not accept that we are united with God’s knowing.

we do not see the world the way the world is, we see it the way we are. change your perception, look for goodness and innocence and you will surely find it. life reflects you – every day is a clean canvas for you to paint your inner state/perception on. what will you choose to see: fear and separation or perfection and love. there is no external force, you make things what they are.

some people do things that you view as “evil”, and that is okay. it only means that what they are doing is something you prefer not to do. but maybe they have to go through that to get to your current perception? this is their free will. you do not know what another person desires or their true intentions. who are we to judge right or wrong. but we can choose. we an recognize things we want and things we don’t want and desire in the direction we want to evolve our perception. yet we have to respect another’s path – judge not for you judge yourself. maybe they want to remember who they are through suffering, for all suffering can do is urge is to change our perception and suffer no more. once again, we see ourselves reflected in all people and things in the external life.

why allow people to walk their path if it seems what they are doing is so wrong? there is only fear and love, and only love is real. life is a game where we constantly recreate who we are by desiring higher. we can go straight in the direction of love by seeing only love reflected everywhere, realizing that is ourselves we release through this perception, and all the world with us (this is what the masters showed us, like Jesus). or we can follow fear and remember who we are through that which we are not, namely death, sickness and sin. we are life, truth and love.

i am saying look in the other direction. we are one creation although the senses doesn’t testify to this. but already science is showing the contentedness of things (Gregg Braden). and of course this is no secret in spirituality, for unity is the great truth. that’s why Jesus said forgive to be forgiven, because it is only your own false perception of the world you forgive. this is how we make the world a better place. through knowing that love is the only substance/force, cause and effect we choose not to see anything another than this reflected in anyone or anything. we look past it to their true Self, which is our own Self. and by doing this we remind them of who they are and they remind us our who we are, One Creation in love, in return. but choose to crucify your brother, to make him guilty of the illusions of fear/suffering and separation he adored (through acts of violence and whatever), then you strengthen the idea that he is indeed lost and separated from God, something that could never be true in reality. we can only separate in illusion.

what you give you receive. by this i mean giving in thought and in feeling. what you think and feel you request life to manifest or show you externally. once everyone desires only love, joy and peace to be shown and no request is made for illusions, what suffering could there be left.

“what we choose to experience in our lives we must first feel in our hearts as if it has already happened” – this is how we create our experiences either consciously or unconsciously, but we always choose. not the “devil”, not anyone else.

but how can i be responsible for another person intentionally hurting my feelings? i like the way Esther Hicks puts it: person ABC hurts my feelings, and i am saying i am responsible for what they did. how? we are like radio towers requesting a certain radio station or life experience. this is all physical life can give us, what we ask and essentially give ourselves. so maybe i had some very nasty thoughts towards ABC in the past. or maybe i was just having an unhappy day in general judging by how i felt (internally, emotion and thought). so that day i was requesting that experience which makes it more likely for my to stumble upon ABC when they are in a bad mood and more prone to hurt me. but the next day i wake up and do something that makes me happy: i like dancing, laughing and praying (thinking things that is positive and i like). then on that day i might naturally avoid ABC if they are in a bad mood.

maybe you’ve had this experience before where your friends change when you change your habits or ways of thinking, feeling and perceiving.

my daily cycle is to focus on pure happiness first thing in the morning. get out of your negative-mind and into your heart. once your in that good feelings you automatically get inspired with ideas about things you want to do immediately. so then i act on it, whether it’s feeding the cats, doing dishes, jogging, writing, whatever. and then i return to that pure happiness through focus again, i get inspired again, act again, and so it goes.

return to pure happiness as often throughout the day, and never act out of fear (or any other emotional derivative).

Books/people i’ve gained inspiration from:
Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy.
A Course in Miracles
Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsch
Esther/Abraham Hicks

There is no suffering in love. There is no fear in love. Love is whole, undivided and unblemished. Good and purely so.

How do we reach this love? Through a change of perception, yay.

How do we navigate perception? Easy. With this one simple rule: wherever you perceive suffering (pain, death, irritation, sorrow, unhappiness, anger, fear… what else) you have perceived wrongly, yay. (What good news!) Why? Because love is whole, undivided with no opposites: “A Kingdom divided against itself cannot stand” – Mark 3:24 knocking at your door (check that little rhyme I threw in there).

Add to this the fact that what you give in perception you receive. Perceiving fear? You are giving yourself more fear. What you fear you attract. What you love you attract. What you FEEL you attract. Prayer is not just words. Words are only used to generate a feeling. The thought/idea is then brought to life by the feeling you fuel it with. Love or fear? All else are just derivatives of those two, so we keep it plain.

Everything that happens to you in life you called upon. At first is might seem… uncomfortable… but at second glance it is most empowering. But how?

I like how Abraham Hicks explains it in this youtube video (you are responsible for how people treat you).

Basically we are signaling-towers requesting a certain radio frequency, or life situation. You cannot experience one radio station (our life experience) while feeling/signaling for another. Once again God is whole, one moment is either complete love or complete fear, there is no gray. So you arrive in an unpleasant situation where someone is severely criticizing you new shoes. How are you responsible for their words? You signaled for that experience. Remember it’s all about timing. If you signaled for joy then you might have stumbled upon that person while they were in a better mood and they might have complimented you instead.

Add to this that life, and all sentient and non-sentient things, only reflect yourself. Life is a blank canvas and you paint on it heaven or hell. Perceive your neighbor as dumb-ass? Only because you perceive a dumb-ass inside of yourself. Everything is One, “judge not for you judge yourself” – Bob Marley. So the quickest way back to happiness after perceiving wrongly is through forgiveness. What do we forgive? Any and all forms of unhappiness as elaborated on above. Then after seeing your brother as pure, harmless and innocent you will once again become aware of the one, true reality of Love.

You feel or signal, love or fear, you act on those feelings at certain times and experience specific situations.

yay

So taking responsibility is the most empowering course of action, because now instead of blaming the other person you change the future by changing in the present what you feel (regardless of what’s happening around you). Consistency is key. Consistently stick with the feeling you want to experience in terms of a time-space situation.

Finally, there is only Love. Regardless of the form or name (person, chair, friend, car, apple) of anything sentient or non-sentient that the eyes perceive, regardless of what the senses experience, choose to see behind them only Love and it’s smooth sailing from there. It’s even us who choose what we feel and experience in the body.

See the body as a vessel at the mercy of nature, cold-winds, perfect diets or other earthly rules, OR see the body as a vessel for bringing unassailable happiness to all of life, incapable of experiencing anything other than…love.